Why I Make Art: A Letter to My Younger Self
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By Hansheng Lee – Lee Hansheng Studios | Art Collective International
Dear Younger Me,
You don’t know this yet, but everything you feel—the intensity, the curiosity, the ache to create, the way the world overwhelms you with its noise and its beauty—it’s going to matter more than you think.
One day, you’ll understand why you kept doodling on the margins of your homework. Why you stared at clouds longer than most people did. Why scraps of paper, color palettes, broken things, and silence made you feel more alive than loud rooms ever could.
You don’t make art just because it’s fun (though it is fun).
You don’t make it just because you’re good at it (even though you are, even when you doubt it).
You make art because it helps you survive.
You make art because it helps you remember who you are.
You make art because it honors every part of you and where you came from.
🖋️ When the World Didn’t See You
You’ll spend years feeling out of place—like you're too soft, too strange, too quiet, or too much. You’ll feel invisible in some spaces, and exposed in others. You'll feel like your kindness is a weakness and your strength is your bitchiness. But your art will always see you. Your sketchbooks will understand things you couldn’t say out loud yet. Your paintings will carry pieces of the real you long before you have the words.
You won’t realize it right away, but every line, every brushstroke, every handmade mark—you were building a language of your own. One that never needed permission.
🌱 When You’re in Pain
There will be times when your body hurts in ways you didn’t expect. Times when chronic pain will slow you down. Times when getting out of bed feels like a bigger battle than anything else on your to-do list. And yes, there will be moments of anger—grief for the things you used to do with ease.
But your art will adapt with you.
It won’t abandon you because your process changes.
You’ll learn to honor your now.
You’ll learn that creating through pain doesn’t make your art weaker—it makes it deeper.
🌊 When You Don’t Feel Brave
You’re going to doubt yourself more than you should. You’ll walk into galleries or markets and wonder if you belong. You’ll hear people say, “Art isn’t a real job,” or “That’s nice, but what’s your backup plan?” You’ll try working for systems (16 years of it) that don’t value your spirit. And eventually, you’ll walk away.
And it will be one of the bravest things you ever do.
You’ll choose the harder road: the one where you build something that matters. Where your art reflects not just beauty, but truth. Where not everyone envisions what you see, but can understand your view. Where you create space for others to feel seen, held, and maybe even healed.
You’ll realize: you don’t make art for approval. You make art to stay whole.
✨ Why You Make Art
You make art because the world is messy and magnificent.
Because sometimes you don’t have the right words.
Because dreams need a place to live.
Because the fights aren't always physical.
Because you’ve always been building something sacred with your hands.
Because art lets you honor the past, speak to the present, and imagine something better.
You make art because it’s how you love.
💬 And One Last Thing...
Don’t let anyone—including yourself—convince you that being sensitive is a weakness. That softness makes you small. That art is frivolous.
Your sensitivity is a compass. Your softness is your resistance.
And your art?
It’s going to grow into something that changes lives—including your own.
So keep going. Keep making things. Keep choosing color, line, texture, voice. Even when it’s hard. Especially when it’s hard.
You’ve never been lost. You just didn't realize your path to becoming.
With love,
Your future self—still painting, still creating, still healing, still here.
—Hansheng
親愛的小翰昇，
你現在還不知道，但你所感受到的一切——那份強烈、好奇、渴望創造的衝動，那種被世界的喧囂與美麗壓得喘不過氣的感覺——將比你想像的還要重要。
有一天，你會明白為什麼你總是在作業的邊緣塗鴉，為什麼你比別人更常抬頭看著雲朵，為什麼碎紙片、色彩搭配、破碎的東西與沉默，會讓你比任何熱鬧的空間都更覺得活著。
你創作藝術，不只是因為它有趣（雖然的確有趣）。
你創作藝術，也不只是因為你擅長（你真的很擅長，即使你常懷疑自己）。
你創作，是因為藝術讓你能夠生存下去。
你創作，是因為它幫助你記得你是誰。
你創作，是因為它讓你尊重自己每一個部分，也尊重你來自的地方。
🖋️ 當世界看不見你時
你會花好幾年覺得自己格格不入——覺得自己太柔軟、太奇怪、太安靜，或是太多了。在某些地方你會覺得自己是隱形的，在另一些地方你又會覺得被過度暴露。你會覺得你的善良是弱點，你的堅強只是脾氣。但你的藝術，永遠會看見你。
你的速寫本會明白你還說不出口的話，你的畫作會承載你真實的部分——甚至在你找到語言之前。
你當時不會意識到，但每一條線、每一筆刷、每一個手作的痕跡，都是你在建立屬於自己的語言——一種不需要經過誰批准的語言。
🌱 當你身體疼痛的時候
有些日子，你的身體會痛得超出你預期。慢性疼痛會拖慢你的一切。有時候，連起床都比清單上的任何一件事還困難。你會有憤怒的時刻——你會懷念那些你曾輕鬆完成的事情。
但你的藝術會隨你而變。
它不會因為你的創作方式改變就離開你。
你會學會尊重「現在的你」。
你會明白：帶著疼痛去創作，不會讓你的作品變得脆弱，反而會讓它更深刻。
🌊 當你不覺得自己勇敢的時候
你會比應該的還要常懷疑自己。你會走進畫廊、市集，懷疑自己是否真的屬於這裡。你會聽見別人說：「藝術不是正職吧？」或者「你有備案嗎？」你會花16年待在不重視靈魂的體制裡。而最終，你會選擇離開。
那將是你做過最勇敢的事之一。
你會選擇那條比較難走的路——去打造有意義的事物。讓你的作品不只是呈現美，而是呈現真實。讓人們即使看不見你所看見的，也能理解你的世界觀。讓你開闢出一個空間，讓他人感到被看見、被接住，甚至被療癒。
你會明白：你不是為了認可而創作，你是為了讓自己完整而創作。
✨ 你為什麼創作
你創作，因為這個世界又混亂又壯麗。
因為有時你找不到適合的話語。
因為夢想需要一個地方落腳。
因為不是所有的戰鬥都發生在表面上。
因為你總是在用雙手建構一種神聖的東西。
因為藝術讓你得以尊重過去、說出現在，並想像出更好的未來。
你創作，是因為這是你愛的方式。
💬 最後想告訴你的是……
別讓任何人——包括你自己——說服你「敏感」就是軟弱。「柔軟」會讓你顯得渺小，或者「藝術」只是一種奢侈。
你的敏感是一種指引。你的柔軟，是一種抵抗。
而你的藝術？
它會成長為改變他人生命的力量——也包括你自己的。
所以繼續吧。繼續創作，繼續選擇色彩、線條、質地與聲音。
即使很困難，尤其是在困難的時候。
你從來不曾迷失。你只是還不知道，那就是你成為自己的道路。
帶著愛，
未來的你——仍在繪畫，仍在創作，仍在療癒，仍在這裡。
——翰昇